Impossible Seduction 8: Dominant Lesbians Dominate Redheaded Mom and Daughter (Three Mothers and Six Daughters)

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During the Nazi regime, lesbians could not continue to live and socialize as they had during the Weimar Republic. Much of German society saw lesbians as social outsiders, meaning people who did not fit into the mainstream. As such, they had a higher risk of being denounced and then targeted by the Nazi regime. A bottom is usually the more submissive one, and the term “pillow princess” is used to describe someone who never gives her partner sexual stimulation. She would prefer to receive only, and she’ll probably be upset if you expect her to return the favor. Their mother smiled with happiness in her, seeing her daughters dominating her son as well as her. She always thought that men are nothing more but snakes and deserve this kind of treatment from women. Josie placed her Puma on his face and held it there for a minute straight. Tommy almost died without any air in him. Summer, his older sister took off her knee high boot and placed it on his face after her younger sister was done. After several minutes they all finished choking him with their terrible foot odor inside of their shoes, boots and heels. I’d come out when I was 17 and been disowned by my parents. I’d moved to London and been in and out relationships and casual flings. She was 40 and had been married for 10 years, with three children under the age of 10. The agency we worked for also represented her husband, an esteemed writer, so I knew I absolutely couldn’t go there. Legler, for their part, recognizes a “lone wolf” effect, one in which some young queers initially love “being the only butch in the room.” In organizing the group portrait that accompanies this essay over the past months, Legler was curious “what it would be like for butches to just show up together and to be able to display all of their power, all of their sexiness, all of their charisma, without having it be mitigated in some way.” And not only for butches of an older generation, but for those still figuring things out, transforming the scene in ways that both defy and inspire their elders. “It’s been centuries in the making, the fact that we are all O.K.,” Legler adds. “That our bodies get to exist: We have to celebrate that. You can do more than just survive. You can contribute.”

When a butch woman does appear in mainstream culture, it’s usually alongside her other: the femme lesbian. Without the femme and the contrast she underscores, the butch is “inherently uncommodifiable,” Bechdel says, since two butches together is just a step “too queer.” We rarely see butches depicted in or as community, an especially sobering observation given the closure of so many lesbian bars over the past two decades. But when you talk to butches, a more nuanced story emerges, one of deep and abiding camaraderie and connection. Despite the dearth of representation, butch love thrives — in the anonymous, knowing glances across the subway platform when we recognize someone like us, and in the bedroom, too. “Many of my longest friendships are with people who register somewhere on the butch scale,” Peirce says. “We’re like married couples who fell in love with each other as friends.” It remains a research challenge to find historical sources related to lesbian experiences under the Nazi regime. Voltairine founded the production company Artvamp in 2000, and has since produced several award-winning feature films. These include the experimental narrative film Profane, which won Best Feature at the Boston Underground Film Festival and Best Film of the Year in the Underground Film Journal, as well as the Creative Capital award-winning documentary Nice Bombs, shot in Baghdad a few months after the beginning of U.S. occupation. Her work has appeared on the Sundance Channel, and many of the films she has worked on have been distributed internationally and shown in festivals and on television worldwide. For her short films, she has received grants from the Princess Grace Foundation and the Film Society of Lincoln Center. She was also given a full merit scholarship to the School of the Art Institute Chicago where she received her Master's in Film and Video. At first, the sex was good," says Sarah. "But she always wanted more than what I could give. One day she came home with a strap-on; if I loved her, she said, I would allow her to use it." Sarah wasn't interested. "It was just something that I didn't like and didn't want," she says. She declined for months, her partner repeatedly pressuring her, until one night, Sarah's partner assaulted her with the strap-on. "Even though I was crying the whole time, she never stopped," Sarah recalls. Sarah left their home that night and sat crying in her car. As a child, she had been repeatedly sexually abused by an uncle —this assault felt just as violating. But she still wasn't sure if she would call it rape. "Because we were together, I thought that she had the right to have sex with me the way she wanted," Sarah explains.Over 10 years later, same-sex rape on college campuses is just starting to be quantified on a national level. Haven, an online sexual assault and awareness program that logs sexual assaults directly from students, works with self-reported data from over 800 colleges and universities. Haven had never compiled a report on undergraduate women who have been assaulted by women, but teamed up with MarieClaire.com to reveal new information: While the number of reported sexual assaults by women was low compared to assaults overall (only about 2.5 percent), the most striking difference came down to the likelihood of survivors to report the incident: 30 percent of women assaulted by another woman told no one, compared to 25 of women who didn't report an assault by a man. Recently, we watched a video that details the questions that new lesbians might want to know: What is a top, what is a bottom, and how can you tell which one someone is? Various right-wing and centrist political groups, as well as mainstream religious organizations, sought to counter this aspect of Weimar culture by promoting their own version of German culture. This version was rooted in classical music and literature, religion, and the family. In some cases, these groups blamed others for corrupting German culture. They blamed, for example, Jews, Communists, and Americans. Nazi Attitudes towards Homosexuality As am I. Representation always matters, whether it's in the Halls of Congress or at your local independent theater. Queer women deserve to have their queer female sex represented on screen, without it devolving into typical pornographic tropes: shaved vaginas, sorority sisters, giant jiggly boobs, foot-long dildos, scissoring, a well-hung neighbor guy who just "pops in" for a threesome, etc. There's absolutely nothing wrong with any of these erotic ingredients, per se, but it's formulaic and not particularly representational of most queer sex. Now this is extremely necessary. I know, I know, I've been on this heels like, aaaalllll day, but you gotta accept your consequences, we're not taking shit from you anymore. So get ready to give up your life to us now."

Like this article? Sign up to our newsletter to get more articles like this delivered straight to your inbox. Most lesbians are considered “switches”, which simply means that they switch between a top and a bottom depending on a variety of factors. Someone can switch between topping and bottoming with the same partner, or they could vary their approach depending on the partner they’re with, or they could even do both in the same sitting. For switches, this type of activity is often fun. Because there was no single law or policy that applied to sexual relations between women, lesbians had a wide range of experiences in Nazi Germany. These experiences were not solely determined by their sexuality. Rather, other factors shaped lesbians’ lives during the Nazi era. Among them were supposed “racial” identity, political attitudes, social class, and gender norms. Based on these factors as well as others, some lesbians (especially those who were working class) were imprisoned or sent to concentration camps. In these instances, they were classified as political prisoners or asocials. Jewish lesbians largely faced Nazi persecution and mass murder as Jews. In most cases, their sexuality was a secondary factor. The Germans and their collaborators murdered an unknown number of Jewish lesbians during World War II. Before the Nazis: Lesbians in the Weimar Republic

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Finally, control is maintained by keeping your submissive in a subservient state of mind. Dominants use their authority to “snap” him into the right mindset. For example, Female-Led-Couple writes: BUTCH” HAS LONG been the name we’ve given a certain kind — that kind — of lesbian. The old adage applies: You know her when you see her. She wears men’s clothing, short hair, no makeup. Butch is an aesthetic, but it also conveys an attitude and energy. Both a gender and a sexuality, butchness is about the body but also transcends it: “We exist in this realm of masculinity that has nothing to do with cis men — that’s the part only we [butches] know how to talk about,” says the 42-year-old writer, former Olympic swimmer and men’s wear model Casey Legler. “Many people don’t even know how to ask questions about who we are, or about what it means to be us.” I want a man that understands obedience. I want a man that structures his whole life around making me happy. My man will follow my rules every day and will always be striving to please me. Through serving me, his life will have real focus and purpose. My man will wholeheartedly accept my training to make him a better husband. He will be my bitch, and he will gain an enormous sense of purpose, calm and wellbeing by being my bitch” During the Weimar era, Germans publicly challenged gender and sexual norms. This was especially true in big cities such as Berlin, Hamburg, and Frankfurt am Main. Weimar’s Lesbian Networks and Communities Lesbians responded to these new fears and conditions in different ways. Not all lesbians made the same decisions. Nor did they all have the same choices. For example, Aryan lesbians had far more options than Jewish or Romani lesbians, who—above all — faced persecution for racial reasons.

There are also submissive tops, although this is less common (and in some cases indicates that the woman is actually “a switch”). A submissive top will likely want her partner to tell her to “top” her, and she’ll get pleasure from being told what to do.

Being both a Dominant and a submissive means being uncomfortable, being vulnerable, open, honest, truthful, respectful, have a sense of humor, and a willingness to fail and grow from those failures. Some of you know and have known for a long time that you were one or the other. Some of you may have times where you feel Dominant and at other times submissive (this is called a Switch). Wherever you fall, just be really honest with yourself about who you are and know that whoever you are and however you identify, you is amazing and never let anyone make you feel otherwise. Coming up next...

Adolf Hitler was appointed chancellor of Germany on January 30, 1933. Soon afterwards, Germany’s gay and lesbian communities came under pressure and scrutiny from the new regime. For men accused of homosexuality, this worsened over the course of the 1930s. They faced brutal persecution. Shutting Down Lesbian and Gay Meeting Places From their earliest incarnations, butches faced brutal discrimination and oppression, not only from outside their community but also from within. A certain brand of (mostly white) lesbian feminism dominant in the late ’70s and early ’80s marginalized certain sorts of “otherness” — working-class lesbians, lesbians of color and masculine-of-center women. They pilloried butchness as inextricably misogynist and butch-femme relationships as dangerous replications of heteronormative roles. (Such rhetoric has resurfaced, as trans men are regularly accused of being anti-feminist in their desire to become the so-called enemy.) Challenged yet again to defend their existence and further define themselves, butches emerged from this debate emboldened, thriving in the late ’80s and early ’90s as women’s studies programs — and, later, gender and queer studies departments — gained traction on North American and European college campuses. “It’s a lovely word, ‘butch’: I’ll take it, if you give it to me,” says Alison Bechdel. “But I’m afraid I’m not butch enough to really claim it. Because part of being butch is owning it, the whole aura around it.” Far too often these days, we think that we deserve to know the intricacies of someone’s sex life. Really, we don’t. You asking an acquaintance what their sexual preferences are is no different than one of your acquaintances asking you, and most likely you’d be offended by the questions. Why should we assume that anyone else feels differently? Friend groups can become divided and the survivor may fear losing her only LGBTQ support network," Kauffman says. "This can be especially challenging for survivors who live in areas where the community is small or there is a more hostile climate towards LGBTQ people."

Definitions of Dominant and Submissive

Besides being a genuinely considerate movie with some thoughtful meditations on religion and culture, it has the added thrill of having super erotic sex scenes, made possible because: In addition, there was no specific law under which lesbians were prosecuted. Thus, there is not always an obvious place to look for criminal records pertaining to their arrests and detentions. For example, lesbians appear in court cases and police files relating to political opposition or asocial behavior. However, these are scattered across many files and in various archives. Scholars hoping to learn about lesbians’ stories are painstakingly combing through these files.