HR Jokes for HR Folks: 250+ Human Resources Jokes

Product Information

Leaving his office, he stopped and asked me, "By the way, which companies are after you?" I responded, "The gas, electric, and cable company." Before you get situated in,” he explained, “we have a small problem…We’ve never had a human resources manager make it this far before, and we’re not sure what to do with you.”

HR just told me that yelling “I don’t want to play anymore!” is not the proper way to exit a meeting.” – unknown Providing employee benefits is the responsibility of the HR team. It would be fantastic if you could convince your HR team that in-office spas are great for everyone. You might want to be a little nicer to your HR executives to get what you want. 7. Cool cool cool, no doubt, no doubt 🆒 Culture fit is serious business. If you don’t believe us, just ask any HR professional. They’re the ones who have to deal with the consequences when someone doesn’t fit in with the company culture.When I got home, I realized I'd accidentally bought a thesaurus. As you can understand, I was pretty crushed... upset... disappointed... vexed... disconcerted. The proper way to use a stress ball is to throw it at the last person that upset you. Instant de-stress. 33. Workplace exercise program Why did the HR manager become a magician? They wanted to make the best talent appear out of thin air. My boss told me “dream on” when I asked if I could come into work late tomorrow. I’m looking forward to it! I cannot make head or tail of this situation,” said the woman, “Yesterday when I was here, and there was a golf course and well-structured country club, and we danced and had a great time. Now, there is nothing but a wasteland full of garbage, and all my friends look miserable.” The Devil smiled at her and told…

What’s the HR manager’s favorite coffee? “Espresso-employee” – it keeps them alert during interviews. If you like the funny HR quotes above, you might also enjoy our post 50 Funny HR Memes [Budget, Resumes, CEOs, Payroll+]. Do You Have Any Favorite Funny Quotes About HR? It’s no secret that HR departments are full of very busy people. Between open enrollment, payroll, training, and recruiting, staying organized is a challenge. I will always choose a lazy person to do a hard job, because a lazy person will find an easy way to do it.” – Bill Gates, American business magnate

46. Multitasking

The banker fell overboard from a friend's sailboat. The friend grabbed a life preserver, held it up, not knowing if the banker could swim, and shouted, "Can you float alone?""Obviously," the banker replied, "but this is quite an interesting time to talk business."